Mother’s Day

I realized the other day that yesterday was my second official Mother’s Day, but my fourth “unofficial” one since Nicholas became a part of our lives. While I am a mother now, the sting of the years of not being one still lingers. My heart truly aches for those that desire to be a mom, but have empty arms. I’m thankful for all the years of heartache because I can go up to a woman on Mother’s Day and say, “I know what you are feeling” and I really do. I realize that some of us handle infertility in different ways. Some of us hide away from the world. Others put on a brave face and you don’t even know they are struggling. This is just a reminder to be sensitive to women that are facing this heartache.

I did have a very good Mother’s Day with my family. I used my son’s awesome memory and observation skills to help Evan and him get the present I wanted. My low maintenance self just wanted a book. I was at the bookstore with Nicholas two days before he and Evan were going when Nicholas saw a book and said, “Mommy, you have that book!” He was right. I had read that particular book a few weeks ago and had already passed it on to my mom. So, I showed him the book that I wanted for Mother’s Day. I gave Evan no book title or author. I just told him that Nicholas would show him. And, it worked! This may come in handy for Evan for our anniversary and my birthday which are coming up.

We were able to spend time with both of our families yesterday, and I didn’t have to make anything. Evan had been on a retreat with the youth group most of the weekend, so he did have to take a cat nap or two yesterday. I was a little jealous as I didn’t sleep well when he was away. He hasn’t been away at night in probably two years. Maybe I’ll get to take a nap on Father’s day.

While I enjoyed my day, I still wonder when #2 will be coming. Hopefully, we’ll hear something soon. But, I am thankful for the son that God gave me already. He keeps my arms plenty full.

No longer empty arms

 

He wanted to hold me too.